Random Guy


Random Guy is not to be confused with Random Ex. You haven’t had a relationship with Random Guy because if you had, that would imply that you have spoken with and seen him on a regular basis. You have done neither with Random Guy. He’s so spontaneous, you just never know when he’ll strike.

Random Guy is the one you’ve deleted at least two times from your cell phone contacts list after he failed to call or text as promised. He’s the guy with the eerie sixth sense; detecting that you’ve moved on and then contacting you out of the blue to remind you he’s there.

Just when you’ve started to get over the fact that he didn’t call when he said he would and that he’s probably just not into you – the phone rings. A familiar number pops up on your call display, but you’re not entirely sure if it’s him.

It will come out of the blue: 1 a.m. as you’re coming home from the bar. Perhaps the call will come at noon on a Sunday, when you’re lazing about your apartment in your pjs. Maybe he’ll email or send you a cheeky Facebook message.

Whatever the occasion, you’re not expecting this call and it throws you off. You forget to be guarded and hostile. You talk about nothing really; your week or, perhaps, even your month – yes, it can be THAT random.

When you hang up, you begin to ask yourself one question: What was the point of that call?

You made small talk, caught up on old times – if you could call your one date “old times.” Not once did he even broach the subject of possibly meeting up for coffee, or even a good shag. He told you how busy he was this week and you ended the call with a vague “Talk to you soon.”

So, just what is his interest in you? Unfortunately Random Guy is so hard to gauge that it would take a highly skilled and well-paid psychologist to decipher his mysterious behaviour. My interpretation – as an unskilled, poorly paid writer – is that he’s extremely self-involved; too centred around his world to grasp the concept of time, and more importantly the feelings of others. Perhaps he has a girlfriend on the side. The possibilities are endless.

The bottom line is to try not to take Random Guy too seriously. Take his out-of-the-blue phone calls in stride. He’s excellent conversation material for a girls’ night out. You can even use his random phone calls as an opportunity to practice the art of randomness yourself. He can’t be the only one getting enjoyment out of his bizarre behaviour.

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